Is Love Possible For You?

Happy Valentine’s Day!

This one goes out to all the lovers out there even if you are single. (Yes, you are still a lover. Everyone is a lover because everyone loves someone, right?)

Maybe you celebrated the day in an elaborate way with your family or friends. Or maybe you decided to pretend Valentine’s Day doesn’t exist. Maybe you were like my husband and I, somewhere in the middle of that.

Valentine’s Day has never been that big of a deal to me, whether I was single, or in a relationship. I would get a balloon or stuffed animal for my mom as a kid and a few valentines from friends. As an adult, my husband and I usually go out to a restaurant to eat. At school, I hate the student parties and overindulgence in candy.

But I have a friend who LOVES Valentine’s Day. I mean, she decorates her house for the holiday and everything. It’s notoriously her favorite holiday. Even though she is usually single (was, past tense as of this edit), she wholeheartedly loves all things love and relationships.

Some of you out there are single and hopeful like her. Too many out there are single and jaded.

I was the latter, although I was eternally single. I did not have a terrible heartbreak or bad experience to contribute to my sour attitude towards relationships. Rather my social anxiety and low self esteem kept me from believing I could form a bond deep enough or meaningful enough to become a worthwhile relationship.

As a little girl who played with dolls, my Barbie and Ken never married. Barbie was extremely successful and did not want a husband. In middle school, when my two best friends wanted to plan each other’s weddings, I opted out, in favor of finding the perfect prom dress instead.

I was that girl who said I would NEVER get married.

I’ve always loved romantic movies, weddings, and I was the supportive friend when my friends started dating and getting married.

I just didn’t believe it was possible for me. I didn’t think I could find MY person. Who would want to deal with all my feelings? Who would willingly choose to deal with the incessant thoughts running through my head?

But then I met someone. When I least expected it. I had gotten so good at being single that being in a relationship felt alien to me. To be totally honest, I almost missed out for fear of failing at it.

See, most of us are afraid of the reality of opening ourselves up to being loved fully.

Rightfully so, it can feel scary. Dangerous even. Especially if you’ve been burned before. It can be scary to leap, not knowing where you’re going to land.

For a long time I was afraid to give my heart away for fear someone would crush it past the point of repair. But I found when I finally did give it away, that didn’t happen. In fact, figuring this “love thing” out has been one of the greatest, least-expected experiences in my life.

Maybe you’ve never been in love and would like to be or you’ve been hurt before and don’t believe you could ever love again. Or maybe you have no desire whatsoever to be married but hope to have that “love of a lifetime.” I’m here to tell you, love IS possible for you.

If it could happen for me who least expected it, it can happen for you. ❤️

#Love #Marriage #Relationships #Single